In Hooch's Eyes

Hooch - RIP (2016)

Hooch holds a special place in my heart as my favorite dog (shh, don't let my current pups know!). I wanted to share a piece from Hooch's perspective, recounting my arrival home after long workdays during my time in New Jersey. I often returned late, and sometimes, I'd prolong my entrance by gathering all my bags from the car—work bag, gym bag, rock climbing gear, and so on.

In Hooch's Eyes

I hear the familiar hum of her SUV drawing near,

Excitement rushes through me, oh my dear!

She's arrived, she's finally here!

I can't contain my joy, it's clear.

I bark, loud and clear,

Signaling I'm ready, eager for our walk so dear.

As a Cane Corso, perks I bear,

No yapping like those tiny chihuahua, I swear.

But where's the  leash? Oh, it's not there!

Moved once again, causing me despair.

In the kitchen, I find it, without a care,

A crumb catches my eye, a distraction rare.

What's that sound?! Oh right! My Beth's home, her presence in the air.

Unlock the door, why bother? I glare,

With my size and strength, I'm a guardian, beware!

Gladness floods  me, beyond compare,

I guide her eagerly, our routine, we share.

In the kitchen, she greets my family with care,

Though sometimes, jealousy, I must bear.

For I want her gaze, her attention to spare,

Scratch my ears, oh Beth, or my favorite, my behind, if you dare.

Though I'm not allowed to jump, I declare,

I leap in joy, my love I can't  impair.

Yes, my slobbers may soil, I'm aware,

But my love for you, Beth, beyond compare.

You make my nights bright, you're my solitaire,

No human love could match, I swear.

When a Country Girl meets a City Boy

When a Country Girl meets a City Boy

When I was a little girl, fairy tales  filled my head,

Dreams of love stories I read.

But as I grew, life showed its scars,

My heart turned tough, like stone and tar.

They said  love would come, just wait and see,

But  I laughed,  love  and I could never agree.

Then you appeared, a city boy in DC,

And I, a country girl from Jersey.

Unexpectedly,  our paths crossed  one night,

You stood tall, a captivating sight.

Your chestnut eyes, a captivating spell,

In that moment, my guarded heart rebelled.

I saw the good, the laughter you bring,

And realized you were  more than a passing fling.

Afraid to lose you,  I hesitated to believe,

But with each moment, my heart started to cleave.

You showed me love's qualities,  rare and true,

In your arms, I found a love anew.

With you, I  stand taller, stronger than before,

For in your embrace, I find solace evermore.

Together, we're  a perfect match, two as one,

A city boy and a country girl,  love won.

You've shown me dreams aren't just for  sleep,

With you, love's promises I'll always keep.

Who would've thought?

That our lives  would  intersect in such an unexpected way.

It's funny how the universe works sometimes.

You, navigating the  hustle of DC,

While I found the comfort  in the familiarity of good old Jersey.

Who would've imagined?

Two people, seemingly worlds apart,

finding common ground and connection.

Who would've guessed?

A city dweller and a country soul,

Coming together, despite the odds.

Yet here we are,

Embracing the beauty of our unique journey.

Creating our own story.

Love  you, Todd! <3

~*~Quicksand ~*~

You caught me in a surprise

I was not prepared for you.

Lost  within myself,

I fought with all my might,

But  I've stumbled and can't  find my footing.

Trapped in the suffocating grasp,

I struggle to breath,

Falling deeper into the abyss.

Like  quicksand, it pulls me  under,

Dragging me down,

Deeper,  with each futile attempt to escape.

I reach out for a lifeline,

But my strength fails me,

Drained by the relentless tide.

Exhausted, I surrender,

As the darkness engulfs me,

Dragging me further into the depths.

I'm submerged in the suffocating embrace,

Drowning in the  unforgiving quicksand.

GTFO, you low-life deafies...

Excited for a night out in Atlantic City, the epitome of glitz and glamour,  I took the time to dress  up, reflecting the vibrant energy of the city's casino and nightlife scene.  There was no question about it, I wouldn't be caught dead  in sweatpants and a t-shirt amidst the dazzling lights and lively atmosphere.

Friends and I entered the room bustling with familiar faces.  Among them was a friend whose casual remark about "deaf clothes" caught me off  guard. Naively, I questioned him, unaware of the significance attached to the attire within the deaf community.

As I observed the room, the friend's words began to resonate.  Plain sneakers, faded jeans, and stained sweatshirts adorned the crowd, each garment telling a story of comfort over style.  It was then that I understood the  concept of "deaf clothes," a subtle expression of identity and belonging.

The friend's insight prompted a deeper reflection on societal norms and personal perceptions.  Would my boyfriend have approached me if I hadn't dressed to impress on our first  meeting? Would I have noticed him if he blended into the background with unremarkable attire?

His words lingered, challenging me to reconsider the importance placed on appearances within the deaf community and beyond. In that moment, I realized the power of self-expression and the significance of embracing one's unique identity, regardless of societal expectations. His perspective opened my eyes to a new understanding, sparking a thoughtful conversation about the complexities of appearance and acceptance within the deaf world.

I hope you'll understand, I don't intend to come across as self-centered, but I believe in taking care of myself and treating others with respect—it's how I was raised. Memories of my mother's stern reminders to brush my hair before church or family gatherings linger in my mind.

Over time, I learned that dressing well commands respect, while a careless appearance can lead to judgment. This lesson became particularly evident during my transition to working for the government. I couldn't help but notice the varied reactions to my deafness. It seemed some were taken aback, as if they'd never encountered an attractive deaf woman before. Conversations with that friend shed light on this puzzling observation. His insights resonated with me. I understood that some may have encountered deaf individuals who didn't prioritize self-care or struggled to communicate effectively.

Education plays a crucial role in shaping individuals within the deaf community. Mainstreamed programs offer exposure to diverse experiences, albeit with challenges like inadequate interpreters. Deaf schools provide full communication access, but may lack exposure to mainstream society. These differences impact behavior, leading some to adopt unconventional actions, misunderstood outside the deaf community.

Parental influence is significant, too. Deaf children miss out on incidental learning from overhearing conversations, affecting their vocabulary and understanding. In my own childhood, I often sought explanations from my parents/siblings. Effective communication between deaf children and hearing parents requires patience and willingness to embrace sign language fully.

Crab Theory

The "Crab Theory" prevalent in the deaf community underscores the struggle against internalized oppression. Like crabs in a barrel, some may resent success in others, fearing their own limitations. Breaking free from this cycle demands resilience and support from within the community.

In sharing these experiences, I hope to foster understanding and empathy, shedding light on the complexities of life within the deaf community.

It's disheartening to admit, but within the deaf community, success can sometimes breed jealousy and resentment. Take Marlee Matlin, for instance—a phenomenal actress whose talent should be celebrated. Yet, instead of support, she faced discrimination simply for embracing her ability to speak. It's absurd; her achievements should inspire, not incite division.

Forgive my candor, but I've noticed a troubling trend among Gallaudet graduates—a reluctance to venture beyond familiar territory. While Gallaudet is undoubtedly a beacon of deaf culture and education, clinging exclusively to its halls post-graduation limits growth and opportunity. Let's spread our wings, showcase our skills, and make our mark on the world.

Turning to my own experiences, I've encountered misconceptions and stereotypes firsthand. Some individuals within the deaf community perpetuate negative perceptions through their behavior—acting out, speaking poorly, and disregarding social norms. In contrast, I strive to present myself professionally, demonstrating competence and independence. It's my small way of challenging misconceptions and proving that deaf individuals are capable, contributing members of society.

Despite my efforts, there are moments of loneliness and frustration. It seems rare to find fellow deaf professionals in similar positions, advocating for equality and respect. Are there others out there, breaking barriers and reshaping perceptions? I hold onto hope that they exist, shining a positive light on the deaf community and dispelling harmful stereotypes.

To those who perpetuate negative stereotypes through their actions, I urge you to reconsider. Your behavior not only reflects poorly on yourself but also impacts how others perceive our community. Let's rise above, striving for excellence and unity, rather than perpetuating harmful stereotypes. Together, we can redefine perceptions and pave the way for a brighter future.

Vick, that scumbag.

Michael Dwayne Vick, the mention of his name fills me with disgust. The name makes me want to vomit in my mouth.  That scumbag.

Let me share what I know about Vick and his despicable actions. He was involved in promoting dog fighting for over three decades! And when he was finally caught, he only served a measly 21 months behind bars—less than two years for such heinous crimes! What kind of justice is that? Then, to add insult to injury, he gets drafted by the Eagles—my team! It's infuriating. And what's worse, people started forgiving him just because he played well on the field! I refused to watch the Eagles, but when I heard they were performing well, I reluctantly tuned in. I couldn't deny Vick's talent, but that doesn't absolve him of his past sins. He learned his playing style from studying the cruelty of dog fights—how sickening is that?

The origins of Vick's depravity remain murky, but what we do know is chilling. In 2001, Vick was hosting dog fights in his parents' garage! One dog was injured, and Vick's own father nursed it back to health. Vick promised his father he would stop, but it was a lie. If he couldn't keep a promise to his own family, how could he make promises to America? His father even admitted, "This is Mike's thing, and he knows it." It's sickening. And his mother, instead of condemning his actions, defended him and lied to the media. Disgraceful.

And as if his crimes against animals weren't enough, Vick's repulsive behavior extends to other areas. He knowingly exposed a woman to herpes and used a fake name to seek treatment. The "Ron Mexico" saga became a laughingstock, but the reality is horrifying. And let's not forget his atrocities against the dogs—hanging, drowning, electrocuting, shooting, strangling—the list goes on. What kind of monster does such things?

But Vick's evil doesn't stop there. He's been involved in drug-related incidents, airport security breaches, and even shootings. He's a repeat offender who refuses to stay on the right side of the law.

To Vick's defenders, I say this: you can make all the excuses you want, but deep down, you know he's despicable. You might admire his skills or believe he's changed, but the truth remains—he's a vile human being.

As for the Eagles, I want them to succeed, but not under Vick's leadership. I'm tired of hearing excuses for him—"give him a chance," "he's changed," "he's sorry." Spare me. He might pretend to be remorseful, but he's only sorry he got caught. Enough is enough.

I was fine

This poem was created on 5/11/09 and obviously based on an ex-boyfriend. :-P

 

"I was fine"

You brought laughter, then tears  to my eyes,

You drove me to madness, left me in sighs.

All because of you, my world's askew,

You changed me completely, that much is true.

Before you, I was  solid, unwavering, and strong,

Now, I'm a mess, uncertain where  I  belong.

Once content and fine, now fragile and lost,

Your presence in my life, a hefty cost.

I was fine before you walked into my life, simple and clear,

But you showed me truths,  unveiled my fear.

Now, I'm reclaiming  what once was mine,

Embracing the clarity, leaving behind the decline.

I was fine before you came, that much is clear,

Now,  without you, I'll find my way,  free from fear.

You're my past, where you rightfully belong,

Moving forward, I'll find my own song.

I was fine before  you,  I'll be  fine once more,

Forgetting you, leaving behind what's in store.

Kiss me, you fool. (7/12/07)

I wrote this poem back in 2007.

Updated 2024.

"Kiss me, you fool"

Should I stroll past once more?

Unsure if my presence you saw,

All I wish to convey, my dear,

"Kiss  me, you fool," loud and clear.

A simple kiss, that's all I crave,

To wash away worries, be brave.

I sense your desire, burning bright,

But mere longing won't set things right.

Take me, envelop me in your embrace,

Let your  lips wander, leaving no trace.

Kiss me you fool, with passion untold,

In your arms, let our love unfold.

Here's a secret, just between us two,

Your kisses on my neck, they undo

Every doubt,  every fear, every fight,

Igniting a fire, fierce and bright.

So kiss  me darling, without delay,

Let our love speak in its own way.

Even in a towel, fresh from the  shower,

Peeking's allowed, embrace the power.

Don't hold back, let your passion rule,

For  in your kisses, I find my fuel.

Kiss me, you fool,  with all  your might,

With each kiss, everything feels right.